I’m exploring this concept that I’ve come up with ( at least as far as i know, seeing as i’ve never heard of it before) called Emotional Pedophilia. And basically its where men or women are attracted to adults who are simple minded, ignorant or just plain stupid. Its usually because these types of adults are easy to use and its completely legal. And as we all know there are alot of adults who are not exactly aware of themselves. I’m not talking about people who are mentally ill or mentally handicapped, I’m talking about people who are wholly minded but the lack social skills to maintain friends that can help build them up and mature. Or they lack self awareness to such a level as to be destructive if they meet someone willing to exploit their ignorance. Maybe they do have friends but their friends are like they are and so its a case of the blind leading the blind. We all know people who are 25, 37, and older who have an almost infantile way of thinking, they lack maturity. And then we all know people who only want to be with people who lacks maturity. Not that they come right out and say ” you know i really want to meet a man/woman who doesnt know the depth of their own worth so that I might prey on them”. My question is why would a person want to be with someone who has the mind of a child? Why would you want to be with someone who thinks like a 7 year old even when they are 35? I think it has to do with domination and control, which is then linked with power and a general all around selfishness.
A person who will only date someone who is their emotional inferior is someone who needs a victim. But a victim who doesn’t quite know they are a victim so that they can be used over and over again without quite realizing whats going on. The longer they are unaware of how you are treating them the longer you can do it. Preying on someone weaker than you are so you can be or feel powerful is disgusting. I submit to you that age is no indicator of maturity or development. If a person never begins taking steps towards self actualizing or realizing their own potential than they will remain emotionally child like. And a person who actually prefers another person who is emotionally child like is either out to exploit them or is like minded.
Now I dont blog to make light of actual pedophilia but rather to discuss the way some people (usually men) will look at a woman who is ignorant, emotionally naieve, and see an easy target. I was on a social networking site this morning and i was reading the statuses of several people and they were saying things like ” if your pictures are provocative dont get mad at me for messaging you about sex, share and share alike”……really? Now it would be unfair to assume that every one that puts up 1 “sexy” pic on the internet is emotionally naieve but it is fair to say some of them who put up larges amounts that are self objectifying might be. It takes a certain mindset to post pictures of your body in various states of undress. Most of the time you want attention, but not necessarily bad attention, just someone to give you a thumbs up, recognize that sexual part of you in a respectful manner without blowing out of proportion as if it were an address to your house for complimentary sex. But what I’m getting at is alot of people who have a large amount of highly sexualized pictures don’t necessarily know their own value. These people who portray themselves in such a way as to suggest that they are soley defined by their sexuality are not whole, and I’m not talking about religion, I’m talking about people that are not quite well rounded, they are seeing themselves through the eyes of the world, so much so that what they present is a person whose sexuality comes first.They spend time developing their sexual selves rather than the tons of other areas that make a person complete. And these people who take one part of their lives and make it the center of their entire lives are just not there yet maturity wise.
So I’m asking why someone, who is at least mature enough to have touched on more than the sexuality side of their own selves, would choose to try and enter the life of someone who is not on that level. Why would you want to be with someone who is not your emotional equal….I think its the same reason why pedophiles choose child victims. They are accessed easily, they are not likely to protest for a long time, they are easily manipulated but there is another spin on people who use adults who are emotionally immature, the emotionally immature are seen as less valuable in our society. thats how you get labels that can explain away an entire human being as useless. And when society doesnt notice you, or considers you weak to the point where they dont acknowledge your importance or facilitate your growth, you are an easy target.
I don’t have any answers just this here theory. And personally I know its possible to go from being emotionally immature to being emotionally stable and aware of yourself….I did it damn near on my own at first than with a counselor but not before I was preyed on by people who could see the weakness in me….What is wrong with people who think its ok to go after others just because they make easy targets? What is wrong with people who would rather control another person than have an equal partnership based on reciprocity….hmmm I dont know