-
do you think ppl should be held accountable IRL for the things they post on social networking sites? -
there seems to be this SHAME in addressing someone IRL over something they put online…as if their online life were out of bounds
-
so ..if you’re online flirting or bashing someone and a family member or a your significant other address you for it….they’re in the wrong
-
what i dont understand is this: your online persona is a public expression of yourself, y do u think u shudnt be held accountable for YOU?
-
there’s alot of cheating that goes on, online, a lot of racism, sexism and hate speech, a lot of planning and plotting against others
-
but somehow people….men specifically think that the whole internet is vegas, and what happens on the internet stays there 0.o #notso
-
you shouldnt go to the internet to have a private life
-
if you’re going to scheme….and you dont want to answer for it IRL, you prolly shudnt tweet about it, i dun care WHO is “stalking” ur page
-
your significant other gets online and catches you calling someone else baby and “the one” and all u can say is “stop stalking my page”
-
instead of tryna work it out…..you paint them as crazy and meddlesome….tryna hold you down, stalking you, obsessing……oh….oh ok
-
but thinking that you can openly tweet about some dirt you are on IRL and still be above reproach is ridiculous
-
i got mad at my …whatever the hell he is…for calling this girl his “prototype” …its a nickname he calls me…and it has significance
-
to him and to me…it goes to a person being everything that you ever wanted in a mate…a model for what you need/want/deserve for yourself
-
called another woman that….and im like …wait…so there’s more than one of us? so aint shit special about that? OH….
-
what makes you the exception?
-
or is it bc i am a woman and you are a man ..and you want the freedom to run game on everyone you come in contact with…..no accountability
-
and another thing….ppl get on the internet and expose themselves to be these REAL SHITTY individuals….and DARE ppl IRL to call em on it
-
and when you do….U’RE in the wrong? lol just some more of those patriarchal power games, where blatantly wrong men can make you look crazy
-
and they gang up on women too! in order to protect their “right” to do internet dirt….one dude says “bitches are crazy for stalking my
-
twitter, facebook etc. page” ….and other men hurriedly agree, bc if they unite behind that dude, then they gain more freedom online
-
that’s how patriarchy works…get all the men in agreement…and all the women fighting each other, and the men rise to the top controlling
-
then there is this message sent that “good women” who keep their men, dont hold them accountable for the things they post online
-
good women dont ‘stalk’ their significant other’s pages bc they have class or bc they trust them or bc ignorance is bliss
-
but am I stalking you if i take a look at your twitter/facebook page once every few weeks to see if you posted any new pics? am i really?
-
am i stalking you if we had an awesome weekend together where i came from out of town to see you, and want to see if you mentioned it?
-
am i stalking you if this is the first time i’ve EVER addressed anything you’ve tweeted, bc it hurt me or disconcerted me? no. I am not.
-
men are very quick to throw around the controlling image of the fem stalker who, stays on their internet pgs all day, waitin for em to fk up
-
you find yourself agreeing with my TL…..even just occasionally….#youmightbeafeminist
-
All I’m really saying is …dont think yu can say hurtful things online, pursue other women openly online….and not answer for it IRL
-
EVERYONE…..everyone has to answer for their behavior….the internet is NO exception
-
now….no one has a right to POLICE your behavior…online or offline…but there’s a difference between policing and holding u accountable
RT @FatFemPinUp: 450lbs *shrugs* and no, im not trying to lose or gain weight 
Woman Denied Plane Access, Dies 407lbs <—-I have a bone to pick November 27, 2012
http://gma.yahoo.com/obese-woman-denied-flights-home-dies-abroad-191137549–abc-news-topstories.html
Above is an article that describes the story of a man who lost his wife because he could not get her home from their vacation because of fat discrimination on airlines. …..I have something to say.
I see a serious problem attached to privilege in this world…..it is by pure privilege that you are one of the people who comfortably fit on air planes….there are alot of people who dont…..extremely tall ppl (6’7), large people (body builders), sumo wrestlers (extremely healthy athletes) …they dont deserve to get on air planes and fly by virtue of their size? what about anorexics? they have an eating disorder….(which by the way is more like a mental illness than an issue of self control) but bc it causes them to grow inward….they are allowed on air planes? I’m sick to death of the people who despise fat people…constantly attributing their size to over eating (when they dont know WHY that person is obese), ascribing personality traits and characteristics to total strangers (laziness, greed, stupidity)…simply bc they LOOK a certain way. I do not know the particulars of why this woman didnt seek a doctor in the country she visited but i do not question her right to travel abroad or her desire to go HOME to seek treatment. Especially with all the stigma world wide of fat people who are sick, you cannot trust any doctor to treat you…..even then, no one has a right to question her desire for treatment in the place of her choice OR her desire for a vacation with her husband, deteriorating health or not!
The fact of the matter is she was denied ACCESS to the only means of travel, for life saving treatment bc she was not skinny and THAT is discrimination based on size. You can blame her all you want too, call her fat, blame her for going on vacation, blame her for not getting treatment in her vacation spot, blame her for being sick and suggest she shud have done something more morally acceptable to avoid being in her predicament but you would be speaking from a place of ignorant bigotry if you did. No one tells people who are handicapped that it’s their fault they dont have access to buildings that serve the public ….if they can’t walk up the damn stairs to get service…there is this false assumption that every fat person is fat as a result of some moral failing. Firstly not every person who is fat has a problem with food, some of them have physical issues that cause them to gain weight. Basically not all fat people are over eaters! uch. And those who are? do you know what bingeing without purging is? it’s an eating disorder, like anorexia …but because it makes people fat, it is not looked at as a disorder…instead people speak hatefully of it, ascribe behavior to it and approach it as a moral issue instead of a psychological issue. Every fat person that has any problem of any kind brought it on themselves because they failed to be skinny and that is simply FALSE and sickening. Check your fucking privilege, you do not know everything about a fat person just bc you can SEE that they are fat. I”m so sorry this man lost his wife in part because of the airlines bigotry and I hope they pay out the ass for it. It IS the airlines responsibility to accommodate the public, no matter WHO that public is. Too many people are willing to excuse the fact that airlines make seats as small as possible, based on a model of human size (as if every human being were objectively between 4’11-5’10 and no more than 150lbs) in order to save money….yet they charge out the ass for tickets no matter WHO is riding….the airlines are also the only ones with the power to take someone country to country in ALOT of cases….so YES, they held the life of this woman in their hands….and the fat stigma is backing them right now but they are WRONG! UCH. Also, was it a question of giving her more than one seat and slightly under booking the flight? If so…why wasnt it done? Or even delaying the flight for a few ppl, considering the health of this woman? according to the article..they got her ON the plane then made her disembark for the “safety” of the other passengers…….i dont like that shit, not one bit
I’d also like to add that the majority of my rage is on the comment section of this article, the fat shaming from the general thread initially had me lit but the fact is that the airline told this man to let them know when they’d be flying back so they could do what they’d did before to get this woman home and somehow…….SOMEHOW they couldnt?
Smolder–Poem November 8, 2012
your name on the tip of my tongue…. smooth your skin slid…too long…
that night you told me to whisper
left an angry flush from your fingertips along my back….just to get a rise out of me
pebble my skin and slap against me even in memory….
your phantom kiss runs to pools slick around my thighs and I find each night as restless as the one before….
all from the yearning…
fevered in me….
slow burning and flameless….
the sun flickered, summoned by my sleeping moan….
we bewitched daybreak with our loving
called the stars to the sky through the quickening…. blended pulse
stayed the sun until our completetion
squeezing infinity into mortal hours for sake of longevity
the cold encompasses the globe…but we smolder
For Women Dealing W/ the Daily Sexual Harassment October 1, 2012
So…yesterday a mechanic showed me his dick in the deserted garage of an empty storage building and I almost had a break down. I have to admit that for a while now I’ve thought all of this sexual harassment was in my head, I even thought somehow I was drawing attention to myself and “asking for it”. Then I realized how ridiculous those two notions were. Leaving the house, going to a grocery store, going to see a mechanic, needing to hire a plumber, having a meeting with a supervisor at work…men in positions of power are unavoidable and there is no scarcity of those who will use that power to their advantage. So…my mechanic showed me his dick after doing about 600$ of work on my car for free (he’s a personal and very close friend of my mother’s) with 200$or so more to go and I was alone and I was afraid and he told me not to tell anyone….yet now you know. This post is for women who deal with daily sexual harassment…women who have experienced a disturbing frequency in the amount of sexual come on’s at work, the cat calls while walking the dog, the male friends who test boundaries, the male acquaintances who make vulgar suggestions or touch them inappropriate, the professional relationships that go sour after a rejection for drinks and a night cap. This post is for YOU. I KNOW how you feel. These last few months I’ve had a friend walk into my apartment uninvited and see me naked and all but blatantly REFUSE to leave and look away. I’ve had a male acquaintance I’d met at a bus stop 5 years prior (never exchanged numbers, never exchanged names, never hung out EVER) approach me while coming out of my house and kiss me on the face. I’ve had a very close male friend show up to my house unannounced and put his hands on my breasts. And yesterday…..YESTERDAY MY MECHANIC SHOWED ME HIS DICK…and he asked “so you gonna show me what black breasts look like?” (he was a white 42 yr old guy)….and I declined politely because I was alone but inside? my stomach was in nervous knots and I was mentally shaking my head…”you have got to be fucking kidding me, whey the fuck would you pull your dick out?! why would you think I would want to see that disgusting fleshly thing? How DARE YOU ask to see my breasts, HOW DARE YOU come on to me like this” ….that’s what I should have said….Instead…Instead I got home in my car safely, told my mom what her friend did and went to bed…when all the lights were out I cried rather ugly, thinking about the last few months and wishing none of it had happened and so….SO frustrated that I couldn’t come up with a viable plan to prevent it from happening again because these situations were beyond my control and …REACTING was my only solution…do you feel like that? You are not alone.
The only way I mentally and emotionally get by when things like this happen to me is by deconstructing them…I MUST understand why they are happening and I MUST know that I am not alone. Things like this happen because men are generally socialized towards patriarchy. Patriarchy says that women were made for men and their purpose is to please men, to submit and be dominated by men…patriarchy say that men are entitled to women’s bodies and can do with them what they wish. Patriarchy says that women are men’s rewards for following patriarchy’s rules….more explicitly SEX is a MAN’S reward for being a man, and it is his for the taking….and the men who harass us follow these rules to a T and they come after any woman in their path for their reward. These men do not see us as human beings because they have been taught that only MEN are human, everything, everyone else is just there to serve men…that is why its not a big deal for a strange man to yell at us across the street that we have a nice ass or to pull up alongside us jogging and compliment our bodies….it’s not a big deal for the men we associate on a professional level (boss, coworker etc.) to compliment our legs, bump into our breasts, put their hands on our shoulders etc, it’s no big deal for the men we need (plumbers, MECHANICS, lawyers) bc women in their occupational fields are scarce, to show us their dicks, corner us in our own homes. They are following the rules….humanity be damned, the subjective humanity of every woman BE DAMNED. They are filling a desire and that desire is sexual attention: “look at my dick”, “HEY YOU ACROSS THE STREET YOU FUCKIN SEXY”, “i love when you walk by my desk to the water cooler”, “driving a car is like fucking”,
My Response To A Man’s Explanation of the label “bitch” September 30, 2012
*I’m addressing this fb status bc I think it mirrors the mindset of a lot of men who do not see or do not care about the harm they do with the labels they give women and who then try to justify those labels with every play in patriarchy’s playbook, I am less upset with the poster and more upset w/ the prevalence of this pattern of behavior and thought*
…bitch…there is a reason there is a difference between the labels DOG and WOMAN…dogs are TRAINED to submit and to serve their masters and because they are much less complex than human beings they derive pleasure from that service….so ….women should love being called bitches because they are less complex then men and thereby should derive pleasure from serving as protector, mother, a mans best friend and loyal? They should derive pleasure from being called “my” bitch because someone ….OWNS us? And someone had the nerve to call this mess “deep”. No it’s not, its badly packaged patriarchy and only other patriarchs and fools who can’t tell the difference will think this is complimentary. As if women should be happy with degradation and dehumanization simply because someone thinks they have a clever way to justify that dehumanization and degradation Lets break it down. Female dogs come when you call, they are BRED when they have puppies, they are loyal to the hand that provides for them bc they’ve been domesticated to be reliant on humans…and again they are simple…they can be TRAINED….and you’re likening a dog to a human being…smh
And here’s another thought…..women should get used to be dehumanized through a label that sets us equal to female dogs…yet it’s not cool to call a man a bitch. I can’t seriously refer to a man as MY BITCH, and he still think I love and respect him and treat him like the subjective human being that he is….why? Because the term bitch is degrading. It is small minded men, who love to dominate the women they hate, that try to come up with ways to justify the expression of that hatred (violence: labels like bitch or actions like hitting women, both are forms of violence). The minute a man is referred to as a woman…as anything feminine, “thems fightin words”….ever call a man a bitch? ever call a man a pussy? the ultimate insult to a man is being labeled as a woman. there is no way bitch or hoe or any other degrading label that can be REASONED or LOGIC-ked into being acceptable and life affirming, certainly not respectful. This dude says “i call you my bitch cause I respect you more than the average female”…..word? So the average female is lower than a dog…a female you respect is equal to a dog….and no one is equal to a man….except himself….and other men. Oh. Ok.
All are welcome
